If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He told me they were just razor bumps!
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
