JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
