What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
