i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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