idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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