My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
