Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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