windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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