I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
