Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize