just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
