You really coming over, don't trick.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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