dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
