my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
