My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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