At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
