Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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