Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
