I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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