I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
