there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize