jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
