Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
