This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize