TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
