So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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