I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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