i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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