Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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