i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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