I will die if light touches me.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
