I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
