i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
