I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
