Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
