So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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