I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize