discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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