your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
