Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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