Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
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If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
