Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Non-Jews are for practice
it hurts more in the daytime
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Is Oprah even human
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
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