She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
