I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
