this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
