What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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