she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Randomize
