Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
