oh god the rape fog is back!
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
