What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
